Morning Report

Date: 2022-12-04 07:06:01

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2022-12-04 07:06:01 bash_dot_org - BEGIN QDB Admin Random >0 Quotes Paypal_Donate Home / Latest / Browse / Random >0 / Top_100-200 / Add_Quote / ModApp / Search / # [quote] #312 +(2154)- [X] <Tux> gimme a P, gimme an A, gimme a N, gimme an I, gimme a T, gimme an E, gimme an S! Whats that spell? <Tux> PANTIES! <Tux> er <Tux> not really <Tux> but it was close! #612 +(578)- [X] <Bambz-216> i don't have anything illegal in my house anymore <Bambz-216> EXCEPT FOR THOSE MEXICANS I BOUGHT! #851 +(1076)- [X] <BlackDeTh> this girl was taking e for the first time.. so i knew what i had to do.. i made it a night she'll remember. (and me too :D <lux> she'll remember it as rape at the trial and you'll remember it as consentual #911 +(461)- [X] <Kez> FIND A DISEASE AND CRAWL INTO BED WITH IT PLS THX #1554 +(746)- [X] <ckx> i get a bunch of scrambled porn <ckx> one time i was jerking off to this channel <ckx> 102 <ckx> and like then i realized it was two guys <ckx> cuz 102 was a gay channel <ckx> 101 was the good hardcore porn <HomerJ> HAW <ckx> but by then i was already into it <ckx> so i didn't change it #1701 +(1332)- [X] <Camo> tress, how do I make a program that makes the cd spin really fast and  does't stop and if you open the cdrom drive, the cd flies out and cuts your  throat? #2706 +(258)- [X] (adm) No definitions found for "verio", perhaps you mean: (adm) SUX #3833 +(164)- [X] <Sylffor> The Legend of Zelda for the NES had replay value with the Second Quest. <TURBOMEAT> by that logic, every single game with Randomly Generated Dungeons has infinite replay value <nitrifik_> I don't even think those have one-play value :o #4723 +(69)- [X] <+DCBastard> just a jpg <@m00cow> what of ? <+DCBastard> apache ah-64 <@m00cow> i've got an apache <@m00cow> webserver that is #7804 +(317)- [X] <Affe> haha my mom just got an email from adultcheck that was supposed to go to my stepdad <Ouroboros> Busted! <Affe> she's like "adultcheck? i hate all this spam" and she clicks on it to delete it, and up comes the preview "dear william (my stepdad), on such and such a date you ordered...." <Affe> haha <Affe> she's all like "asshole" #8126 +(83)- [X] <Avatar> teenyboppers rule *** Avatar was kicked by ChanOP ([Sphinx45] britney says hi) <Tamgerine> Martin, I've seen you car-dance to Britney ... case closed. <Sphinx45> i can like britney and not be a teenybopper! #8867 +(58)- [X] <Rance> i'm right next to a gateway country... i should walk in with my powerbook :) #10649 +(53)- [X] <freshmint> SHE is teen pr0n in the flesh <freshmint> Too bad she's fucked in the head #10725 +(282)- [X] urban13eatnik : I wonder. is there a feeling when you see a woman in porno and you're sure that she's someone you know? BeHeMoTh101 : yes urban13eatnik : what is it? BeHeMoTh101 : it's called IKNOWDATBITCH #11216 +(289)- [X] <Phonoflux> So I was watching TV last night <Phonoflux> and my mom <Phonoflux> she lent over and opened her legs <cuebol> and I climbed out #11251 +(209)- [X] <Zombie> will you beat up Red Sky for me? <Ryco> no =P <Zombie> He almost cost me my JOB <kesu-cho> what did RS do <kesu-cho> that almost cost you your job? <Zombie> He told my Boss I wanted to have sex with him #16035 +(273)- [X] <^Baka^> I wish there was a unix command called train <^Baka^> then someone would eventually have to type man train #16527 +(1066)- [X] <CraNKGod> YOU KNOW WHAT'LL BE NEAT ABOUT LIVING ON MY OWN <Funk> Being able to run up and down the hallway naked but for a sock on your erect penis? <CraNKGod> BEING ABLE TO DRINK STRAIGHT OUT OF THE MILK JUG <Funk> Oh. <Funk> Man, you need a better imagination. #17475 +(149)- [X] * Techniq throws salt in FG's eyes * FuNGuY throws ass in techo's dick #21899 +(226)- [X] <MrSatan> gordon>you thecms "logo2 that you drew that gets used on everything? <gordon> eh?! <ManInBlac> <MrSatan> gordon> you know the CMS "logo" that you drew, that gets used on everything? <ManInBlac> got to love the MrSatan -> English translator on AltaVista   #23036 +(155)- [X] <GreenEyes> gawd i hate it when i'm mid sneeze and it just disappears! <GreenEyes> it's like almost cumming heheh <DJUrsus> Does GE have blue sinuses? #26234 +(454)- [X] <Camus> my dad has a spiked collar.. <Camus> dog* #26562 +(363)- [X] <kisama> hold on we made charts of our class schedules <kisama> WHERE THEY DON'T OVERLAP THERE'S WACKING TIME <nyisles> thats why i didnt go away to college <nyisles> i could never have a roommate <nyisles> jerking off would be way too awkward <Guilty> Ny, I imagine everyone does it in the shower <Guilty> So hygiene benefits from awkwardness <Guilty> Or just get a girlfriend <nyisles> that 's so inconvenient when I 've got 8+ gigs of video porn on my HDD! <DrNick668> guilty: can u get waterproof pron? <Guilty> Having sex with a girl wouldnt be nearly as awkward in front of someone <nyisles> it would be to me <Guilty> Its called your imagination, nick <kisama> hmm <kisama> on mondays, wednesdays <kisama> and fridays <kisama> i can wack it <kuro> i won 't be anywhere around <kuro> i 'll be in class <kuro> so he can do whatever the fuck he wants, as long as my stuff is still clean when i get home <Guilty> Snow is so honest <Guilty> He says right in front of his roomate "On monday and friday I'll be masturbating while you're at class" <kuro> i won't come back early #31560 +(240)- [X] <twink-E> man i've tried PCP, LSD, DMT, and THC, but nothing beats IRC! #33746 +(25)- [X] <@trejkaz> if exists c:\porn then alert("YOU HAVE PORNO!") #34648 +(1462)- [X] <hailz_b> pepsi is gayyyyyyy <hailz_b> gayyyyyyyy <hailz_b> give me cock anyday <hailz_b> i mean coke! #48336 +(226)- [X] <Mime> If you ejaculate on the moon, do you go flying backwards? #49258 +(97)- [X] * Joins: Ramza (spoon@h24-85-88-13.wp.shawcable.net) <Ramza> jhzsdkjdsf * Parts: Ramza (spoon@h24-85-88-13.wp.shawcable.net) <Temujin> Why does he keep doing that... <DopeHat> He's on crack. <Temujin> ...... <Temujin> Canadians can't afford crack. <Temujin> They smoke Clorox. #50833 +(171)- [X] <Gonkster> when i worked for stagecoach, lass sat on periscope, no knicks on <Gonkster> ffs, i nearly knocked down a building lol <Gonkster> just saw this beaver winkin at me down periscope lol #52462 +(497)- [X] <Cloe> be quiet or i'll beat you like a rented mule <Crowley> you abuse your rented pack animals? <Cloe> yes, i do <Cloe> now carry my stuff up the trail <Crowley> suck my huge donkey dick #60523 +(1145)- [X] <fcastle> I HAD A NIGHTMARE <fcastle> IT ALL STARTED NORMAL <fcastle> 10101010 <fcastle> 10110011 <fcastle> THEN ALL OF A SUDAN <fcastle> 1100102 <snooz> GAAAAH #75645 +(180)- [X] <cricket> I'm sure horse semen is just as tasty as regular semen #81866 +(81)- [X] <b1u3> know whatd rule <b1u3> if somehow, we got bush and his two daughters and suddam and his two sons in a ring, with glass shard laced gloves, like in that movie kickboxxer <b1u3> or give the bush daughters two beer bottles apiece and send them to melee the fuck out of the iraqui ground soldiers...a bush girl with a beer bottle against a skinny iraqui whos only there so his family doesnt get gassed is like bruce lee against david spade #187846 +(204)- [X] <aml_> i mean, if you decapitate someone with a sword, it's not fucking ceremonial <dabblerblue> unless you're the highlander!! #200868 +(289)- [X] <EvilGenius> HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!! <nykoelle> HAPPY NEW YEAR <solace> 2004!! <nykoelle> YAYA <nykoelle> !!! <nykoelle> </2003> <solace> HAPPY NEW YEARRRR <EvilGenius> rofl meg #216963 +(1443)- [X] <billiam> crap... some one knocked over my recycle bin... there's icons all over my desktop... #262353 +(14064)- [X] <MooseOnDaLoose> Hey Mike <goatboy> what? <MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy. <goatboy> er? <MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy. <goatboy> and? <MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy. <goatboy> ... <MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy. <goatboy> i dont get it <MooseOnDaLoose> AND YOU NEVER WILL. <goatboy> bastard #265090 +(402)- [X] <Ck3> know whats pedophile's favorite chord? <Ck3> A minor #307172 +(552)- [X] <Jaidev> If you want to know what I think about bottled water, what does 'Evian' spell backwards? #331410 +(253)- [X] <Z-U> how do u say that u r leaving <Z-U> ? <Xelloss> bye typing "i'm leaving" without the quotation marks <Z-U> oh #347268 +(2043)- [X] <cow_hax0r> HOLY HOLY FUCKING SHIT AFK A SEC <leecher> er... <cow_hax0r> Sorry back <leecher> what's the problem, house on fire? <cow_hax0r> No I had to get a drink <leecher> so why the urgency? <cow_hax0r> Well... I REALLY had to get a drink <leecher> so your house wasn't on fire or being attacked by ninja's? <cow_hax0r> Well.. no, but my throat was kinda dry #446931 +(2682)- [X] <tHiSiSbOb> I just lost a friend... He got into a car accident... Young people can die too. I just played starcraft with him the other day.... <black_mage_s> Well, there is always the single player campaign. #495887 +(1460)- [X] <srty> Light travels faster than sound. <arilsotil> WRONG <boya> This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak #675105 +(1011)- [X] <kan> the nigerian government has orderd 1,000,000 of those "100 dollar laptops" for its people. <kan> just what we need more nigerians sending email. #676781 +(524)- [X] A[S]Vicious: Dude.. I fell asleep last night when I was talking to my girlfriend on the phone.. She was masturbating to my voice, and started talking about how her big vibrator was stuck, and she couldn't get it out. A[S]Vicious: And I fell asleep.. A[S]Vicious: It was awesome #762742 +(1095)- [X] <godlys0ldier> How can i know what a $rand number is gonna be <Spitfire3292> ...Thats gotta be the fuckin stupidest thing i've heard all day #781115 +(527)- [X] Ang3lClds82776: no, seriously, what is the difference btwn a graphics processor and a graphics accelerator?? Philmj88: Well, to give you an idea....a graphics processor is like an artist.... Philmj88: a graphics accelerator is like an autistic kid with a paintbrush... #796595 +(1288)- [X] <ZellKFF> We were talking about religion today <ZellKFF> and my 6 years old kid asked me "religion? is that a legendary pokemon?" #917681 +(757)- [X] <incluye> OH! Shit it's your birthday, isn't it. <thom> Yeh <incluye> I have something for you. <thom> Really?! <incluye> Yeah. <incluye> localhostr.com/files/a19ydd/q.gif <thom> WTF <thom> It's just an animation of some dude getting a rag tied around his face <incluye> I know. <incluye> It's a gag gif. * You have been kicked from the channel by thom (never speak to me again) #945194 +(398)- [X] <T> I couldn't decided what I wanted so I just got one box of each type of fruit snacks, some gummy bears, and 5 pints of americone dream ice cream <T> When I went up to the checkout, the lady looked at me like I was crazy after she finished ringing me up <T> I'm not sure if it's cause I spent $100 on fruit snacks, or if it was cause I had a sword <T> Anyway, so I tie the bag handles around the hilt of the sword, cause there's too many bags to carry, and I set off down the road <T> nobody tries to stop me <T> I get about 3 of the 6-7 blocks towards home down when a police cruiser pulls up beside me and tells me to put everything down and put my hands on my head <T> Luckily, as I've said before, the cops in the UC/Converse area are cool as shit <T> It's only SAPD that sucks <T> So the first thing the cop says is "Is that a weapon son?", to which I reply "It's a sword, officer" <T> So, I reply "No officer, I just wanted some fruit snacks." <T> Now he's really giving me a look, and puts his spotlight right in my eyes <T> He says "Are you high son?" <T> "No officer, just a little drunk." <T> He's like "Alright, well since you've been honest with me, let's get you home. Let me see your ID." <T> So I give him my driver's license, he tells me to hop in the back, and he takes me to my house and drops me off <T> I ate an entire box of fruit snacks in the back seat of a police cruiser <T> He even let me keep my sword Home / Latest / Browse / Random >0 / Top_100-200 / Add_Quote / Search / ModApp 0.1677 21096 quotes approved; 1874 quotes pending Hosted_by_Idologic:_high_quality_reseller_and_dedicated_hosting. © QDB 1999-2022, All Rights Reserved. 2022-12-04 07:06:02 bash_dot_org - END
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Version: 2022-11-19T20:14:20-05:00/74c5444e9cb8c76e5a0dfbf9d914979820fa06b5/clean No watches or warnings in effect, Montréal Current Conditions: Mostly Cloudy, -3.9°C Sunday: A mix of sun and cloud. High minus 2. Sunday night: Chance of flurries. Temperature steady near minus 1. POP 40% Monday: A mix of sun and cloud. High plus 4. Monday night: Chance of showers. Low plus 3. POP 40% Tuesday: Rain. High plus 3. Tuesday night: Showers. Low plus 3. Wednesday: Rain. High 6. Wednesday night: Showers. Low plus 3. Thursday: Cloudy. High plus 4. Thursday night: Clear. Low minus 11. Friday: Sunny. High minus 6. Friday night: Clear. Low minus 10. Saturday: A mix of sun and cloud. High minus 4.
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====================================================================== Wikipedia Featured Article ====================================================================== ***** From today's featured article ***** [Lee_Smith] Lee_Smith (born December 4, 1957) is an American former pitcher in professional baseball who played 18 years in Major_League_Baseball (MLB) for eight teams. A native of Jamestown,_Louisiana, Smith was selected by the Chicago_Cubs in the 1975_MLB_draft. In 1991, he set a National_League (NL) record with 47 saves for the St._Louis_Cardinals, and was runner-up for the league's Cy_Young_Award; it was the second of three times Smith led_the_NL_in_saves, and he later led the American_League in saves once. At his retirement, he held the major league record for career_games_finished (802) and was third in games_pitched (1,022). He still holds the record for career saves for the Cubs (180) and held the same record for the Cardinals (160) until 2006. After his playing career, Smith worked as a pitching instructor in Minor_League_Baseball for the San_Francisco Giants. He served as the pitching coach for the South_Africa_national_baseball team in the World_Baseball_Classics of 2006 and 2009. (Full article...)

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